It Begins

So they say: Everything falls into place.

They don’t say: The fall is scary as hell.

Some time ago I applied to graduate school and figured the rest would work itself out. If you want something bad enough, isn't the universe supposed to conspire in your favor?

Maybe it does. I was accepted into the perfect program: a joint master's of public administration in strategic public policy and a master's of arts in international affairs... in Paris, that is. Living with my parents, whilst testing my mental stability, proved an effecient way to save money and self. In six months at home, I regained the strength and spirit I thought I'd lost.

But today my wishful thinking -- me saving tons of money; me overcoming the anxiety of student loans; me passing up the current opportunities for new, uncharted ones; me fearlessly facing 3+ years far from my family; me easily planning the next stage of my life without care -- came to a stunning collision with reality.

Today, I gave my notice.

When I first thought about going to graduate school, I figured I could do so debt free with enough saved in the bank to live off of for however many years it took. Instead, as I told the brilliant and empowered women I work with and for, I found myself in a very different position. Armed with a modest savings and plans to rack up quite the credit card bill, I'm crafting an itinerary that includes a summer off and une vie a Paris far beyond my means.

Work hard, play harder -- right?

So in 143 days I arrive in St. Tropez for three months of light labor, then to Paris for three years of education.

I have a dog that will join me. I have tuition to pay, an apartment to rent, a language to learn. Anxieties to overcome. All of these things, I hope, will simply fall into place.